Wednesday, December 19, 2012

It's a 40k Chrismahanukwanska!

It’s that wonderful time of year. A time of decorations, family, food, and of course presents. It is in that spirit of giving that I present the armies of 40k each with a seasonal treat. Of course, I did draw some inspiration from another certain fat jolly fellow and a few armies will get the coal they so rightly deserve, but all in all, just about everyone was good this year so should have a happy holiday. **Note: I did not want to use the easy answer of “A new book” or “a price drop”. I’ll put it right here, everyone should get a 20% price drop minimum and some of the really insanely priced things should get even more, but I wanted to give this more thought.

Black Templar – 6th edition brought with it some tremendous things a horde can do. Numbers are more valuable then ever and Black Templar are among the few armies flexible enough to build around a horde while not relying on it entirely. To that end, I give Templar Scouts that they can take without a Marine in the squad. BT will make for an awesome all-scout army lead by the Emperor’s champion and its’ what I’d love to see.

Blood Angels – BA are a tough one. They’ve been good so they don’t at all deserve coal, but at the same time they are an army that really doesn’t need much. I think the best thing I can give them is jump packs for their command squad. I really don’t know why they can’t take them. I love the idea of an all jump BA army and I’m so glad that with the lack of interest in Razorbacks, this tactic is coming back, so I’m giving the Blood Angels the ability to give their jump captain a proper escort.

Chaos Demons – Here we have another army that doesn’t deserve coal, but really doesn’t need much. I think the best gift I can give Demons are AFFORDABLE PLASTIC (not failcast) greater demon kits.

Chaos Space Marines – This is another one that’s tough. They just got a book, and a good, balanced one at that. They have a few gaps in their line…not big ones and nothing that can’t be filled by a box of CSM and a little creativity. I think I’d give them some mobility. Sure, Raptors and Bikers got better and cheaper, but they really lack a delivery system for some of their cooler things. Chosen, Possessed and Berserkers are awesome, but they have 2 options…go big and hope some of the mob makes it or pay for a land raider. Rhinos just don’t cut it since you’re sacrificing at least 2 turns now that you can’t assault from them at all. CSM either need some sort of drop-pod type delivery or a flyer with a cargo capacity, so my gift is a gift certificate good for one fast transport option.

Dark Angels – Now here’s an army that may not need my gift, since rumors are pointing to them being the next book to get an update. Like I said, I won’t use the “a new book” as the easy answer because that would cover at least 4 armies on the list. I’ve decided their gift will be a boost to what once made them unique. Once upon a time, Dark Angels were special for 2 reasons: 1. they could take bikes as troops (but now Space Marines do it better) and 2. They could take Terminators as troops (but now Space Wolves do it better and Grey Knights do it WAY better). For the Dark Angels, I give easier access to Ravenwing and Deathwing, as well as an appropriate point adjustment to make them at least as good as the competition.

Dark Eldar – OK, first both Eldar armies get a lump of common sense coal. Eldar and Dark Eldar CANNOT ally. I mean, come on. They’ve only hated each other for a few millennia… now they’re bosom buddies? No. That’s over. OK, on to the Dark Eldar specifically. Again, they’re in decent shape. Overwatch can be painful since they likely won’t get a save, but it hits on 6’s so get over it. I wanted to give them something unique and powerful, but not game-breaking. I think a good answer would be to allow units coming through the webway portal to assault on that turn. This makes the portal dangerous, but since all the other rules apply, it can be avoided. They have to get where they want the portal and survive to drop it, but if it’s in the middle of your line you have a problem. If you can get away from it, you then get the same time to shoot whatever comes out. It’s not game-breaking but it’s different.

Eldar – Oh Eldar… these guys are tough because they really don’t need a gift so much as they need a lot of little tweaks. Most of their army is over-costed still…the fact that they can throw a ton of massed mid-strength fire and that their anti-psyker abilities are by far the best around do help that a bit though. For Eldar, I give reasonably priced PLASTIC aspect warriors boxes. Oh if not for the waste of resources that the hobbit is, you might have gotten these…

Grey Knights – Ah the army that made 5th edition not fun. You better believe you’re getting a big heap of coal for that one. This army is just sickening how unbalanced they are, and from what’s being said, they will continue to stand out as insanely overpowered. Rumor has it the power level we saw from the CSM is the level we should expect, which is good because that book is good, while not being broken…the way a codex should be (all hail Kelly, 6’s be upon him). So here it comes…first, say good-bye to psykobroke grenades. These things are just stupid. Maybe MAYBE the Grand master can take them, but they won’t be cheap. Second, Draigo…um…no. You already get Termies as troops stock, there’s no reason to give Paladins too so Draigo-wing is gone. Draigo himself remains, but he doesn’t affect the force org anymore. I thought about re-costing the psyflemen dreads, too but they aren’t as bad as they used to be. I still think I’m being too nice, but for now that’s it.
Stay tuned for part 2...

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