It’s that wonderful time of year. A
time of decorations, family, food, and of course presents. It is in that spirit
of giving that I present the armies of 40k each with a seasonal treat. Of
course, I did draw some inspiration from another certain fat jolly fellow and a
few armies will get the coal they so rightly deserve, but all in all, just about
everyone was good this year so should have a happy holiday. **Note: I did not
want to use the easy answer of “A new book” or “a price drop”. I’ll put it
right here, everyone should get a 20% price drop minimum and some of the really
insanely priced things should get even more, but I wanted to give this more
thought.
Black Templar – 6th
edition brought with it some tremendous things a horde can do. Numbers are more
valuable then ever and Black Templar are among the few armies flexible enough to
build around a horde while not relying on it entirely. To that end, I give
Templar Scouts that they can take without a Marine in the squad. BT will make
for an awesome all-scout army lead by the Emperor’s champion and its’ what I’d
love to see.
Blood Angels – BA are a tough one.
They’ve been good so they don’t at all deserve coal, but at the same time they
are an army that really doesn’t need much. I think the best thing I can give
them is jump packs for their command squad. I really don’t know why they can’t
take them. I love the idea of an all jump BA army and I’m so glad that with the
lack of interest in Razorbacks, this tactic is coming back, so I’m giving the
Blood Angels the ability to give their jump captain a proper
escort.
Chaos Demons – Here we have another
army that doesn’t deserve coal, but really doesn’t need much. I think the best
gift I can give Demons are AFFORDABLE PLASTIC (not failcast) greater demon
kits.
Chaos Space Marines – This is
another one that’s tough. They just got a book, and a good, balanced one at
that. They have a few gaps in their line…not big ones and nothing that can’t be
filled by a box of CSM and a little creativity. I think I’d give them some
mobility. Sure, Raptors and Bikers got better and cheaper, but they really lack
a delivery system for some of their cooler things. Chosen , Possessed and Berserkers are awesome, but they
have 2 options…go big and hope some of the mob makes it or pay for a land
raider. Rhinos just don’t cut it since you’re sacrificing at least 2 turns now
that you can’t assault from them at all. CSM either need some sort of drop-pod
type delivery or a flyer with a cargo capacity, so my gift is a gift certificate
good for one fast transport option.
Dark Angels – Now here’s an army
that may not need my gift, since rumors are pointing to them being the next book
to get an update. Like I said, I won’t use the “a new book” as the easy answer
because that would cover at least 4 armies on the list. I’ve decided their gift
will be a boost to what once made them unique. Once upon a time, Dark Angels
were special for 2 reasons: 1. they could take bikes as troops (but now Space
Marines do it better) and 2. They could take Terminators as troops (but now
Space Wolves do it better and Grey Knights do it WAY better). For the Dark
Angels, I give easier access to Ravenwing and Deathwing, as well as an
appropriate point adjustment to make them at least as good as the
competition.
Dark Eldar – OK, first both Eldar
armies get a lump of common sense coal. Eldar and Dark Eldar CANNOT ally. I
mean, come on. They’ve only hated each other for a few millennia… now they’re
bosom buddies? No. That’s over. OK, on to the Dark Eldar specifically.
Again, they’re in decent shape. Overwatch can be painful since they likely
won’t get a save, but it hits on 6’s so get over it. I wanted to give them
something unique and powerful, but not game-breaking. I think a good answer
would be to allow units coming through the webway portal to assault on that
turn. This makes the portal dangerous, but since all the other rules apply, it
can be avoided. They have to get where they want the portal and survive to drop
it, but if it’s in the middle of your line you have a problem. If you can get
away from it, you then get the same time to shoot whatever comes out. It’s not
game-breaking but it’s different.
Eldar – Oh Eldar… these guys are
tough because they really don’t need a gift so much as they need a lot of little
tweaks. Most of their army is over-costed still…the fact that they can throw a ton of massed mid-strength
fire and that their anti-psyker abilities are by far the best around do help
that a bit though. For Eldar, I give reasonably priced PLASTIC aspect warriors
boxes. Oh if not for the waste of resources that the hobbit is, you might have
gotten these…
Grey Knights – Ah the army that made
5th edition not fun. You better believe you’re getting a big heap of
coal for that one. This army is just sickening how unbalanced they are, and
from what’s being said, they will continue to stand out as insanely
overpowered. Rumor has it the power level we saw from the CSM is the level we
should expect, which is good because that book is good, while not being
broken…the way a codex should be (all hail Kelly, 6’s be upon him). So here it
comes…first, say good-bye to psykobroke grenades. These things are just
stupid. Maybe MAYBE the Grand master can take them, but they won’t be cheap.
Second, Draigo…um…no. You already get Termies as troops stock, there’s no
reason to give Paladins too so Draigo-wing is gone. Draigo himself remains, but
he doesn’t affect the force org anymore. I thought about re-costing the
psyflemen dreads, too but they aren’t as bad as they used to be. I still think
I’m being too nice, but for now that’s it.
Stay tuned for part 2...
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